Word: hasselhoff
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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...million to write and star in Sprockets, a feature film based on the forbiddingly avant-garde German talk-show host Dieter that he played on SNL. Of course, Myers will have some backup. Reportedly, one version of the script for Sprockets had a role for Baywatch mastermind David Hasselhoff as a villain who, on tour in Germany, kidnaps Dieter's monkey...
...large is the local David Hasselhoff fan club...
...then, the South Park phenomenon is a benign one. Nevertheless, there is a problem: while the show has many virtues, it should be smarter and more surprising. It's a pretty stale idea now to think that Streisand and David Hasselhoff and MacGyver are instant punch lines, and in general Parker and Stone express too much fascination with cheesy pop culture, a subject whose interest has been exhausted. As for their "satire," is it really so very clever to give Jesus a public-access show? Were not stoned sophomores dreaming up this sort of thing 20 years ago? Most troubling...
...then heads down to the beach to find the only missing character, the cute, innocent Jamie (Nicole Eggert). They find she has matured quite a bit and now uses her talents on Baywatch as a lifeguard. When Scott Baio goes to hug his ex-collegue, David Hasselhoff springs into action, throwing punches in slow-motion. Hasselhoff shows Charles who, exactly is in charge...
...constructive engagement," I argued. Forget embargoes, trade sanctions and all the rest. The way to foster political liberalization and free market capitalism in the huge country is to somehow pump "Baywatch" into the homes of all its people. You know, a kind of 'Radio Free Asia' for the David-Hasselhoff-deprived. If China would just succumb to American pop culture like the rest of the world, my thinking went, it couldn't be long before it adopted our values as well...