Word: heerd
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Preacher Howard has baptized hundreds of Ozark people. One of his strangest converts was an old granny. The blind old woman summoned him to her cabin, said: "From what I heerd about ye, preacher, I reckon I kin trust ye ter keep a secret. Hit's always been a deep sorrer in my life, I kin tell ye. My own children don't know and nobody else here knows. But, preacher, I feel I ain't much longer fer this world and I jist gotta confess hit ter somebody...
Next to her " 'Tain't funny, McGee," the most reliable line in the weekly Johnson Wax act is the "deef" Old Timer's topper for Fibber's gags: "That's pretty good, Johnny, but that ain't the way I heerd it. . . ." The Old Timer...
...aint particklar whut youre age or whuther your one uv them thar big handsum broots jest so yawr a blond. All i want is a home and sum hogs ter slop and chickens ter feed. i heerd that that thar school uv larnin reely did put out som purty good gents so i'll guarantee ya Ill do all the house work like cuttin the wood, haulin the water an milkin the knows. We shore would make a good happy pare...
...Former Apple Butter Stirrers' Society Fer the Purpose of Promulgatin, Promotin and Perpetuatin Memories of Apple Butter Stirrin Days I'll se what we kin do in Green Valley to help on the Perpetuatin. I got another nephew up at Cherry Hill mebbe you never heerd of, names Henry O'Hope. I rember one time when Henry was a little kodger his ma and him come over to make us a visit. His Aunt Sarah an me was stirrin Apple Butter out back of the kitchen wen they drove up. Henry jumped out an come over...
Entr'acte, "Heinrichen am Heerd...