Word: helle
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...Make a lifelike Jeremy R. Knowles mask. The Dean of the Faculty of Arts and Sciences isn’t allowed to drink wherever the hell he wants, but he is allowed to drink at the tailgate...
...Make a lifelike James B. Conant ’13 mask. The reanimated corpse of the President of Harvard University is allowed to drink wherever the hell he wants...
...Make a lifelike Benedict H. Gross ’71 mask. The Dean of the College is allowed to drink wherever the hell he wants...
It’s Harvard-Yale week again, and that means that our school spirit is running higher than Yale’s reparation debts. Hell, Peter even dyed his toilet bowl crimson, although that could have been because he ate a shattered beer bottle on a dare. But the spirit doesn’t stop there, and, as usual, we’ve been sucked into the classic rivalry...
...gave that old Yalie douche hell, but don’t worry, cause there’s no way those New Haven losers can even attempt to mess with our president’s head like that. That prank would never work on Derek C. Bok, since his only son is Al Capone, who died of syphilis in 1947. And besides, it wouldn’t have the same effect. You simply can’t say “fucking” over a Western Union telegraph line, which is the only long distance service that Bok knows...