Word: heros
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...cloud of gloom looms over fair Cambridge. The town villains have captured thousands of students and trapped them in small rooms where they must read philosophical theory and science "texts." The future looks bleak for these captives. But there is one hope. Our hero, the biggest comic book collection in the land (okay, Harvard) can be found lying in wait among mere mortals in the Qube, a.k.a. Quincy House library...
...HERO EMERGES FROM...] the jungle after 25 years and into modern San Francisco...
...HERO EMERGES FROM...] a block of ice after thousands of years and into modern Encino...
...HERO EMERGES FROM... a bomb shelter after 30 years and into modern Los Angeles...
Dawson, uh, James Van Der Beek, is the second string quarterback who sees no action on and off the field until the town hero is sidelined by a tendon-tearing sack. His band of yuk-ups consists of a jolly redneck Billy Bob, a Casanova with a strategically placed cowboy hat, and a black running back who's only purpose, it seems, is to fulfill a hopelessly contrived racism subplot. Throw in a dash of T & A, a pinch of pecs, the trampy, whipped cream bikini-wearing blond cheerleader and bring to a simmer in a cauldron of frothy beer...