Word: hooks
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...four years to develop a reputation, so there’s no rush. Remaining inconspicuous, however, can seem impossible at Harvard, which is why it is essential to master the inevitable “walk of shame” (“stride of pride”?). Limiting your hook-ups to other freshmen makes this experience slightly less cringe-worthy, since the dash home stays within the comforting confines of the Yard. One technique to remain slightly more inconspicuous is to always travel with a long coat to hide everything—or nothing—underneath. Another, albeit...
...then there are some hook-ups that even the slickest sleuths should avoid at all costs. “Dormcest” is always a bad idea. If things go sour, your 4 a.m. vending machine visits will always be wrought with the fear of bumping into your ex-lover buying Diet Coke for a new honey, or using the basement dryers for something other than drying clothes. Plus, dorms are mini-Harvards—word gets around pretty fast, and nobody wants to be the year’s “Holworthy Ho?...
...Another situation to avoid entirely is hooking up with the roommates of past flings. Although Harvard hotties tend to travel, and thus live, in packs, it is best to choose one and stick with him or her. A drunken trip to the bathroom might result in the return to a familiar, but wrong, bed. And of course, don’t hook up with your own roommate either—that should be self-explanatory...
...should also be prepared to lose more than just your dignity after a hook-up. Once the sun starts rising, illuminating all the flaws that were somehow hidden hours earlier, the impulse is to simply get out of that room ASAP. The result is often the loss of anything from underwear to jewelry to ID cards, and whether you get them back or not is really up to you. If you desperately need that blue scarf or Red Sox hat, then send a Facebook message to your partner in crime and ask them if they would kindly leave...
...real banking system, and its demise now threatens both. "As much as I don't want to be here asking for this, it pains me to do this, we believe that this is much less costly than the alternative," Paulson said this morning. "The taxpayer is already on the hook for the impact on the economy if our financial markets don't work the way they need to work," he said...