Word: idiotically
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...assume, fully conversant with The Rules. You've consumed the Chicken Soup books. And you've snapped up 10 Steps to a Great Relationship, even though you have 100 Best Ways to Stay Together on the shelf at home. So why would you possibly be interested in The Complete Idiot's Guide to Being Faithful, a soon-to-be-published tome that manages to fill 352 pages explicating the proposition that cheating is unwise? (A section on terminating an affair is headed "A Happy Ending? Probably...
...must be some kind of idiot. Or maybe a dummy. But at least there are plenty like you. Just check out the proliferating titles from the two giants of the how-to publishing industry. The burgeoning For Dummies series, which began with instructional books on software, now has 373 titles, ranging from Buying a Car for Dummies to Sex for Dummies (by Dr. Ruth Westheimer). With 50 million copies in print in 38 languages, sales reached $120 million in 1997, up 23% from the year before--a robust enough growth curve to allow parent company IDG to complete a public...
...truth." This is an impossible standard. No one knows the whole truth. (Omniscience is not a human attribute.) Moreover, humankind cannot bear "nothing but the truth." Meursault in Camus's The Stranger is incapable of lying and is executed for it. Prince Mishkin in Dostoevsky's The Idiot is a man of perfect honesty who brings disaster to everyone he meets. And in Liar, Liar, Jim Carrey, who has played a few idiots in his time, is even more insufferable as a truth teller than as an inveterate b.s. artist...
...have any rubles. Only an idiot would pay in rubles...
When did you last make it through a day without wanting to choke one of the following: a cabbie, a telemarketer, the idiot driver in the next lane, the repairman who showed up three hours late, the people who control Internet access, all airline executives, a meter maid, some insipid bureaucrat, one of Larry King's guests or King himself...