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...prospectives get starry-eyed just thinking about Harvard. And no, they aren’t dreaming of 4-years of HUDS eating, Orgo midterms, or beautiful New England weather. Instead, they're contemplating that ravishingly handsome Harvard boy who will whisk them away into a lifetime of I-Banking (insert financial crisis joke here), supported vacations in Monaco, stylish lofts on the Upper East side, a golden retriever, and 2.4 progeny, Harvard class of 2029. Because, really, where else will there ever be a gathering of so many future millionaires, politicians, lawyers and doctors eager to shed lifetimes of awkward...
Because some of you may have other things to do than read such stimulating blocks of text, Flyby has parsed all 686 words of wisdom and translated what Mike and Evelynn actually mean by, say, [insert any one of the convoluted 39-word sentences peppered with double-speak]. Translation after the jump...
...haphazardly revealing pertinent details of their inner lives as they relate to the story. He also provides a relatively detached critical insight into the more volatile personalities at work; this distance offers some respite from the roiling, overheated emotion of the female protagonists. Tadashi, amusingly, does not neglect to insert his own opinions into the other narratives, in the form of slightly snide footnotes and cross-references to previously mentioned information.Boyle clearly has a gift for the compelling. As the self-appointed narrator of this tale, Tadashi illustrates the life of the so-called apprentices who sign up to learn...
...clock news is for their bottom-of-the-hour human interest stories. You know, a leprechaun in Alabama, that sort of thing. And, as the genius mash-up, "Finally Tonight, Jesus..." points out, one of the more popular newscast-ending segments is that wonderful evergreen, "Look at this crazy [insert object name here] that looks like [insert deity name here]."(See The Internet's 99 Greatest Hits...
...Obama can expect that moderates will insert some sturdy leashes on his spending down the road. "There'll definitely be movements by moderate Democrats to impose fiscal responsibility," says Lieberman. "I'm not sure what form it'll take, but we'll start to try to cut back and also put some brakes in place...