Word: jedi
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Dates: during 2000-2009
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...England's knights are a less and less impressive fighting force Losers MIKE TYSON Iron Mike goes "crazy" in Cuba and gets in a fight with journalists. As all brave reporters would, they react by running like scared rabbits 'N SYNC Boy band to be Jedi in next Star Wars film, only to get blown up in seconds. And just like that, George Lucas makes up for Phantom Menace ADOLF HITLER Evil dictator deposed as world's most hated man by bin Laden. Not to worry, he still holds a slight lead on world's most hated facial hair...
...Yoda can move his eyes, mouth and ears in a reasonably lifelike fashion while mumbling cryptic epigrams about the Force. He comes with a miniature light saber (it's about a foot long), and if you stand in front of him and wave it around, he'll critique your Jedi technique. Parents beware: kids may resort to Jedi mind tricks...
...Friday afternoon at Balboa Park in San Diego, a rock concert was out of control. Between 4,000 and 5,000 people turned up, some with MCCAIN MAJORITY signs, others with Jedi light sabers. Two helicopters hovered overhead, and McCain's bus had to park well out of the way to avoid running into the throng. Where there was a time early on in New Hampshire when McCain just kept talking until there was nothing more to say, now he barely has to say anything. He says hello, and the crowd goes nuts. "He's a phenomenon," says Kevin Staff...