Word: jerris
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...Luckily, this was the week that the editors of "Survivor 2" answered the water-cooler question of the week: Where the heck's Amber been? This was the episode that Queen "I'm serious now because I'm wearing my unattractive glasses" Jerri's bland and beautiful lady-in-waiting finally got up off the cutting-room floor...
...wrong. "Survivor" is fascinating television. I love watching the growing tension between Jerri and Keith; agonizing over whether Kel really tucked into a private stash of beef jerky; pondering whether Elizabeth has the power to protect Roger; wondering how many pounds of water I could balance on my shoulders. Still, as an Australian and a pedant, I am heartily disappointed with the "reality" of the setting. What Jeff and his producers call the Outback is a lush, watery place in the rainy season, not the dry, red desert we associate with the word. And survive? The good people of Ogakor...
...cool off in. In the true Outback, water is often found only by digging a hole at the bottom of a rocky outcrop. It can get up to 120 degrees during the day and there is precious little shade. There's no ankle-deep water for a bikini-clad Jerri to lounge in and proclaim "Look at us. Just hanging out like we're on vacation." Indeed...
...Then it was about, well, you know - Jerri and Colby, massaging each other in the tent while the Burnett squad tried to drum up a lady-and-the-tiger dynamic between the cowboy and the movie star. Didn't seem to fit - she's the predator, and in it for the hoochie, and she'll find plenty of people to throw overboard before she parts with the strong, good-looking fella. That betrayal's at least eight weeks away...
...Keith tried to round up Tina and Maralyn and one other swing justice against Mitchell, but when push came to shove he was all alone, lying to the camera about how "You just look tired" (though Mitchell is getting very thin). Jerri got a vote from Maralyn, which would have been fun if Mad Dog had had any help...