Word: kirklanders
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Matthew W. Mahan ’05 is a social studies concentrator in Kirkland House. He is the incoming president of the Undergraduate Council...
...will not be missed by the rest of the free world. But a far more discomforting silence has greeted the ears over intersession: the silence of complacency. It has been only a few weeks since Mather House declared unilateral war on its riverside peer on the grounds that Kirkland House had taken the gong. Where is the campus outrage at this act of martial arrogance...
...must always be a last resort, for any House—even for the River’s last superpower. (Harvard’s cutting-edge political scientists measure global strength in cubic yards of concrete.) Sadly, it is patent that Mather has made its declaration against Kirkland without even the briefest of diplomatic engagements. No attempt seems to have been made to involve the Undergraduate Council in the mounting problem of the gong; nor could Mather be troubled to wait for final exams to start before crying havoc. This war is an act of unacceptable spontaneity, announced and perhaps...
Even more shocking are the growing questions surrounding Mather’s pretext for initiating aggression. Where is the evidence that Kirkland has the gong? At the outbreak of war, Mather pointed to circumstantial indicators including a UPS slip signed by a notable Kirkland resident, and let their hysterical rhetoric do the rest. But time has cast harsh doubt on that slip’s authenticity—indeed, some have even suggested that high-ranking officials of Mather’s House Committee altered the slip to implicate Kirkland...
...Kirkland—did any Houses in the region have functioning gongs ready to resound at any interhouse interloper within seconds, as has been claimed by the most ardent hawks? The more time passes, the more it seems like Mather is only after the DeWolfe apartments, now occupied by Kirkland affiliates, that it mentioned in its declaration...