Word: knobler
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...manifesto explaining "The Former Website Incident," Knobler writes, "The e-mail harshly (and, although my perspective is biased, I would say baselessly) insulted both my website and myself." Crushed by the attack, Knobler scheduled a face-to-face showdown with his buff tormentor. Meanwhile, a slew of e-mails from other irked athletes relentlessly inundated his in-box until he shut down knobler.com for the first time in two years...
...knobler.com, however, there was a light at the end of the tunnel. After taking a sabbatical from online ridicule, Knobler has put the website back in business. Showcasing new-found first-year abilities, he boasts to fellow cyber-surfers of skills in English, Spanish, Hebrew, Latin, Chinese, French, Italian, Russian "and German, among others...
...Ultimately, Knobler admits the situation brought unforseen benefits by forcing him to create a new-and-improved website. He writes, "It reflects a maturer Jonah Knobler, one very different from the Jonah who created the last rendition of knobler.com almost two years...
...Although the pissed-off e-mailers were lifting furiously in the Murr Center and unable to comment on their antagonist, other students were eager to condemn the jock-attack. Varsity rower Michael J. Skey '02 explains he would never have complained to Knobler, saying, "How did athletes learn to surf the net? The only sites I know of are Internet porn...
...Knobler's troubles appear to have ended, but the "Breaking News" section of his site reveals that his painful experiences have made him cagey, even in the face of this story. On his new website he admits, "As I write these words, I am somewhat nervous about this article--I don't know how big it will be, or what lurid claims it will make...