Word: lamonts
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...that you're done, it's understandable that you feel like celebrating. But according to this analogy, all of your friends who aren't done with exams yet are still pregnant (you may have noticed them getting rounder—that's actually all of the Lamont Cafe pastries), and they'd really appreciate it if you were sensitive to their special condition...
...Quit bragging. So you wrote six papers in 72 hours without sleeping or leaving Lamont or eating anything you didn't buy from a vending machine. It's over. Others are still carrying around the Miracle of Life [Sci 1B study guides], and hearing about your ordeal and/or your post exam shennanigans isn't making it any easier. Stop blabbering and give your exam-bound friends a foot...
...talk to us, who are sparkling and different and bright. (The B's go to Radcliffe girls who memorize the text and quote it verbatim, in perfectly looped letters with circles over the i's.) Not, I remind you, necessarily to people who have locked themselves in Lamont for a week and seminared and outlined and underlined and typed their notes and argued out all of Leibniz's fallacies with their mothers. They often get A's too, but, as Mr. Carswell sagely observed, this takes too long. There are other ways...
Tired of getting kicked out of Widener at 10 p.m.? Can't escape the Law School Library? Is Lamont feeling like too much of a party? We understand what you're going through. In order to make this reading period slightly more bearable, we've found some hidden treasures on campus for those late-night cramming sessions...
...interested in private or casual study, the adjoining lounge's couches and plush chairs provide a great place to take care of that reading (and sleeping) you've been putting off this term. If you're out of Board Plus and not interested in spending your life savings in Lamont Café, the Owen Room's proximity to the dining hall makes this room a perfect home base for prolonged study...