Word: mcl
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...Epernay, a faithful Boswell, is the development of the McLandress Dimension, a measurement designed to record the length of time an individual can keep his thoughts centered on subjects other than himself. The unit of measurement is termed the McLandress Coefficient--known to the cognoscenti as the McL-C (pronounced Mack-el-see); a McL-C of 60 minutes, which is above average, means that the subject's thoughts return to himself approximately every hour...
...Dimension is the highpoint of Dr. McLandress' career, Mr. Epernay's account of the McL-C's of various prominent people is the highpoint of The McLandress Dimension. He seems to delight in sly jabs at the greats as he records these sophisticated, psychological VIP-coated gossip columns...
Each profession tends to have its own characteristic McLandress rating. Elizabeth Taylor and David Susskind have McL-C's of three minutes, which is not surprising among personalities in the entertainment field. Nikita Khrushcher, who has a theatrical flare of his own, also has a three-minue McL-C. In the scientific community, Dr. Robert Oppenheimer has an amazing coefficient of 3 hours, 30 minutes, which may be a cause of his problems as a security risk. President Pusey, on the other hand, has an unspectacular 45-minute McL...
...Gaulle's thoughts are constantly on France, but he has come to identify France with his own personality. Thus, appropriately adjusted, de Gaulle's coefficient is actually one minute, 30 seconds. Similarly, the former American ambassador to India, John Kenneth Galbraith, Paul M. Warburg Professor of Economics, has a McL-C of one minute, 51 seconds, the lowest in the Federal government. However, if Richard Nixon should be elected President next year, his three-second coefficient would make a record...
...Ambassador to India, Author (The Affluent Society) J. Kenneth Galbraith was heard to voice similar views on the subject of State Department potato picking. Curiously, Galbraith claims that he has never heard of Mark Epernay. Author Epernay has heard of Galbraith, all right. He gives him a McL-C of 1¼ minutes, lowest of any executive then attached to the Federal Government...