Word: methodic
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Dates: during 1950-1959
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...fight programs have helpful and somewhat startling translations for English-speaking visitors. After Welterweight Sriswasdi Thiamprasidth won his $50 purse, the traveling sportsman could have got a bet down in the next event on another "youngster full of all actions with never retreat, who loves the give and take method to provide sensation for fans to their hearts' content...
Died. Kokichi Mikimoto, 95, onetime noodle merchant who became the world's largest producer of cultured pearls; of a kidney ailment; in Nagoya, Japan. Perfecting by trial and error a method of seeding oysters known since the 13th century (a fleck of sand or a tiny bead is forced into the oyster, which seeks to counteract the irritant by coating it with layer upon layer of pearl-making nacre), spry, fun-loving Mikimoto (who entertained his employees with feats of magic and parasol-twirling) scandalized Paris in 1913, when he first brought his quarter-price pearls to the international...
...first, and perhaps the simplest method, is to reply, "Why no, I haven't been across, not recently that is. Of course, I lived there until I was eight, but then . . . you know . . . the Nazis . . . had to leave (your voice should break about here) . . . wouldn't go back for the world . . . memories you know. But (brighten up here) don't you think I've done wonders with that beastly German accent?" Since the only accent you posses is a slight Oxford drawl, picked up during occasional inter-House meals at Eliot, your listeners can not but be impressed...
...second method, while it requires a much braver intellectual front, has the great advantage of making your World Travelers feel as if they had done The Wrong Thing. When asked if you have been abroad you reply, diffidently yet with assurance, "No, never thought of it. Spend all my summers in Los Blancos, New Mexico. D. H. Lawrence country, you know. No, no Europe for me. You know what Orwell said, an old boneheap and all that. After all, it's the Pueblos that have the real past and the mystique. Matter of fact, they've got the future...
Perhaps the most effective Inpatriate method to squelch the regurgitation of summers abroad is to listen very attentively, occasionally brushing a tear from your cheek. When this has attracted sufficient notice you will be asked the inevitable question. Squaring your shoulders, you reply, "No, never. I'd love to go, just love to, but can't spare the money. The family, of course. Sole support. Work' in the mines all summer." Here you simply but dramatically turn your dirt-grimed and work-beaten palms to the assembled company. Since you have had the foresight to rub your hands...