Word: midget
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...truly goofy tests, visit thespark.com which is targeted toward teens, and take anything from "The Lazy Test" (sample: Has masturbation lost its fun?) to "The Slut Test" (Do you own a midget who serves you sex in the night?), all of which are free. The quizzes at rateyourself.com range from "What Kind of Underwear Is Right for You?" to "Are You a Creative Lover?" Even the more sober topics, like "Should You Go to Graduate School" and "Does Your Boss Take Advantage of You?" take less than 10 minutes to complete...
...Send Me Bruckheimer and Bay! Time to rewrite those history books; earlier this week divers confirmed the discovery of a downed Japanese midget submarine just outside Pearl Harbor. The sunken sub appears to corroborate a long-held theory that the U.S., not the Japanese, fired the first shot in the Pacific war. The submarine is believed to have gone down just hours before the Japanese began their surprise aerial attack. Let's just hope this new information doesn?t mean we have to watch a remake of "Pearl Harbor...
...breaker as minor-league owners, seeing profits in a business that had stagnated for decades, have opened new stadiums and offered every conceivable promotion to attract fans. Indeed, the showmanship is a throwback to the days of Bill Veeck, the legendary, maverick big-league owner who once sent a midget to bat. The St. Paul Saints, owned by Veeck's son Mike, gave out inflatable bats, sponsored by the maker of Viagra, to every man over 21. In Nashville, Tenn., 15 nuns opened a game with the national anthem and came back during the 7th-inning stretch to perform...
...have jobs, but it never occurred to me. I was always fascinated not only by the lifestyle or the performing, but the feeling of living in the circus and being surrounded by any variety of people. I'm not only talking about skin color or religion, but even a midget or a giant, or whatever you are. In the circus, it sounds clich? but it's true, they are equal. You take a person for who he really is inside, and not because he is 35 inches or 7 feet tall. The values are different than in normal society. There...
...CROWE Mr. Oscar's next film runs afoul of the Screen Actors Guild. Perhaps the film's title, Why Actors Make the Best Scabs, is the issue JERRY SPRINGER Bush says his talk show made terrorists think the U.S. was weak. Obviously they didn't see how far a midget hillbilly can throw a chair...