Word: minnelli
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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...LIZA MINNELLI Garlandkind stars on B'way, quits drugs. Next Sardi's visit, lay off the cheesecake...
...Liza Minnelli doesn't sweep, diva-style, into the restaurant for an interview. She sort of edges in, warily, close to a publicist, wrapped in folds of black that effectively hide a figure that once ballooned so much that paparazzi competed for photos as though they were getting paid by the pound. Yet she's looking better these days, down 40 lbs. thanks to a high-protein diet (this evening's menu: carpaccio, swordfish steak and hot milk for dessert). Her weight, of course, is hardly the only thing that has made her a star of the gossip pages. There...
...like most soap operas, this one is gearing up for another emotional climax. It's a comeback on Broadway, where Liza opens this week in a month-long concert engagement at the Palace Theater, where Garland herself once staged a famous comeback. Called Minnelli on Minnelli, Liza's show is a tribute to the movies of her father Vincente, director of such classic Hollywood musicals as Meet Me in St. Louis, An American in Paris and Gigi. In it she reminisces a bit, shows pictures from the family album, sings numbers identified with her mother that she would never touch...
...only if she assured him she would get herself into shape. "I told her if I couldn't sit in a room and listen and be proud of her, I'm out. I said I don't want to see you fail." Now, claims Ebb--who wrote and directed Minnelli on Minnelli--she's in "the best shape literally I have ever seen...
...Ryder (she performs an unusual exercise with Ping-Pong balls); Bill Gates (he is shot dead because Windows 98 isn't fast enough); Saddam Hussein (he has a gay affair with Satan and toys shamelessly with the Horned One's affections); Barbra Streisand (for all the old reasons); Liza Minnelli (don't ask); and God (who is vilified by one of the movie's guest kid heroes). Also anyone who lacks a bottomless tolerance for inspired comic rudeness...