Word: mitzvahs
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...when people will enter "recovery" at 13 and pen best-selling memoirs on their struggles before they've even taken their SATs. Expect a crop of precocious old souls filling the talk shows with painful reminiscences of their abrupt descent into addiction after, in the months preceding their Bar Mitzvah, their Internet start-up lost half its market cap because of an unforeseen jump in interest rates...
...around in a tuxedo and plastic lei, a conical hat affixed to your head with an elastic chin strap, washing down fish eggs with carbonated white wine, as some glorified Bar Mitzvah band plays Public Enemy's Don't Believe the Hype, has always seemed to me a pretty lame way to spend the night...
...letters. "Everyone has a little piece of the puzzle," says Estelle Guzik, director of the New York Jewish Genealogical Society, who set out to trace relatives killed in the Holocaust. In one family a cousin had saved a 20-year-old invitation list to a son's bar mitzvah. An elderly invitee from Israel still lived at the same address and referred Guzik to her son, a rabbi, who provided a family tree stretching from Australia to France...
Hays is also a prize-winning sailor and best-selling author, and he is now working on a book titled Today I am a Boy, about his Bar Mitzvah...
...them dog antidepressants. June 25 is the first Take Your Dog to Work Day. June 26 is Why Does This Office Smell Bad? Day. While the homeless go ignored, almost 28.5 million Americans bought their dogs Christmas presents last year. A woman I know throws her dogs a Bar Mitzvah every year. That's not even correct on a religious level. People knit their dogs things. Now I've never knitted anything, but it looks like a pretty serious endeavor. If getting married meant knitting something instead of buying a ring, there would be even more out-of-wedlock births...