Word: moms
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Dates: during 1970-1979
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...Wall has petered out at bottle No. 37. Now sullen silence prevails, punctuated only by stage whispers to the effect that some parents feed their kids, for cryinoutloud. Egg McMuffined for breakfast, Burger Kinged at lunch and Stuckeyed in between, the little ones are hungry again. For that matter, Mom and Dad deserve another break today. A pit stop is called for. Time...
...doubled, his triglyceride level has dropped, his sexual performance is off the charts, and his life expectancy has approached that of a Galapagos tortoise, all because he has begun daily sessions on an exercise bicycle. Nothing stimulates the gag reflex so quickly as news photos of entire families-mom, dad and six children-jogging in identical warmup suits. And nothing is more appalling than, as a 10-to 15-mile-a-week runner (which is to say a moderate lunatic; some glittery-eyed types run 100 miles a week), to hear the deadening quack of zealotry come from...
...Dear Mom...
...Mom, the main thing is you've got to tell Dad to stop telling those World War II stories of his, that Willie and Joe stuff from the old cartoons. I mean, it's so out of date you wouldn't believe, I mean, ancient. Like, let me explain...
...worry, Mom. It's a brand-new Army and it's great. Well, I gotta stop now. I got KP tonight...