Word: mops
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...there other news schlock fanatics out there somewhere, eager to explore a fantasy world more "real" than everyday life because it appears in print? I'm not sure there are. Perhaps most of the shlock readership is made up of housewives, middle-American prisoners of the vacuum and the mop, crying babies over their shoulders and Rice Krispies cookies in their ovens. The Star, after all, is ostensibly for "American Women." The Enquirer and Midnight claim a more diverse audience...
Take a can of Endust and a dry mop and dust off Briggs Cage...
...with a mop can expect respect from a banker, or an attorney, or men who create jobs, and all you have is a mop. Are you crazy? Whoever heard of integration between a mop and a banker...
...deer. He talks of a blustering poet, "all red and arrogant and full of spondees." He spins a long unlikelihood to illustrate a proverb made up on the spot: "The Devil is most likely to strike when you have your trousers down." Oops! Bad taste? Upon my soul, mop...
...Lieutenant Governor James B. Hunt, 39, a former Peace Corpsman who became head of the state's Young Democratic organization, is favored to replace Republican Incumbent James Holshouser (who is prohibited by law from succeeding himself). In Tennessee, former Democratic State Chairman James R. Sasser, 39, who has a mop of hair and a smile reminiscent of John F. Kennedy, is running an energetic campaign for the U.S. Senate. Says he: "If I take a day off, I just get restless and run out of the house to find a hand to shake." Sasser, a onetime legislative assistant...