Word: morons
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Soupy Sales is a short-haired fellow with a kumquat nose, a moron-the-merrier expression, a crushed stovepipe hat, buttoned collar and huge bow tie. His métier is sick slapstick. He gets laughs by biting off a neighbor's hangnail or hitting an old lady with a custard pie-not in the face, but up under her arm, as if the pie were a small bucket...
...Prowl Cars. Salaries, starting at $393 a month in Denver, were only a small part of the problem. Another was the system of recruiting and training young policemen. In Denver almost any able-bodied young man who is not a certifiable moron can join the force. John Paul Kenney, professor of public administration at U.C.L.A. and a former policeman himself, who was called in by Democratic Governor Stephen McNichols to investigate the Denver scandals, says: "The police thieves are for the most part naive, simple farm boys from small-income, modest homes. They don't have much education, usually...
Only now and then does he get a laughable line ("Are you a moron?" "No, I am a Catholic."). Only one, when Bing Crosby mistakes him for a fan and casually autographs the tortilla that he is holding, does the unimpressionable Cantinflas get a line that is unforgettable. He looks amazed at the tortilla, stares indignantly at Crosby, then inquires: "Why you poot eenk on my lonch...
...Competitive Edge. Moorman, former vice president for sales and advertising at Schick, candidly admitted that when it came to watches, "I'm a moron." He set out to learn about watches-and what was wrong with Elgin-by paying $50,000 for market surveys. The surveys showed that Elgin simply was not making what buyers wanted. Men were found to prefer round watches (most of Elgin's were rectangular), to like functional stainless steel water-and shockproof cases (Elgin's were mostly yellow gold), to want sweep second hands (only 15% of Elgin's models...
...clod ye oaf ye moron ye imbecile...