Word: moschitta
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Dates: during 1987-1987
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...Minute University" tenured the world's fastest talker to zip through lectures on 10 subjects key to any core curriculum. If the American mind is closed, Professor John Moschitta's curriculum will enlighten it in about as much time as it takes an automatic garage door to open and shut...
PROFESSOR MOSCHITTA is best at using examples to bring theory home to students. He illustrates survival of the fittest with the evolution of tougher puff balls; he shows supply and demand with the "boom or bust beet/brussel sprout market...
Some of Professor Moschitta's pithy capsulizations of catastrophic subjects actually ring true. No one could dispute his explanation of what is relevant about relativity: "It destroys your sense of space, trashes time, lambasts length, builds bombs and makes the world a much more interesting place, relatively speaking...
Then there is the Freudian explanation for the insanity caused by addiction to Wheel of Fortune: "It is the work of the unconscious mind comprised of the sex-starved war monger id and the goody-goody super ego." Even Moschitta's discourses on literature seem to encapsulate the key points of that concentration's tutorial: "War and Peace is exactly like Moby Dick because both are incredibly boring. That's what makes great books great...
...Moschitta says he developed his speaking skill in the closet. When he was 12 he set out to break the world's fast-talking record and, after his family had herded him out of hearing range, he succeeded in uttering 534 words in 58 seconds. Now when he goes into high gear he can speak an incomprehensible 12 words a second...