Word: musicalization
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...What do you want for Christmas, Johnny? An iPhone? Well let me tell you what Uncle Cliff’s going to do for you. No, don’t touch your uncle’s eggnog. I’m going to give you an iPhone without the music, the video—sit on my LAP, damn it—without the touch-screen, the sleek interface, or a reliable network. How does that sound? Johnny, have I ever told you that you look like a young Cary Grant? 3. “Valkyrie?...
...Money,” and “Rock of Love: Charm School,” propelling my rate of brain cell loss to unprecedented levels. 4. You will become smarter. In elimination rounds, contestants are quizzed on their knowledge of everything from geography (for the beauties) to pop music (for the geeks). These are often hilariously worded (Ex. “His song ‘In Da Club’ is a hit at the club”) and sometimes strangely difficult (I’ll admit: I had no idea what OPEC stood for. I hope this...
Although I only lived in the great city of Houston, Texas for the first four years of my life, I still feel the need to highlight the strengths of the Lone Star State as we near the end of a particularly unpopular presidency. 5. Austin, Texas. Live music capital of the world... 4. “All my Exes Live in Texas” by George Strait 3. Sandra Cisneros and all of the other Chicano authors 2. Cacti! 1. BEVO. He’s a longhorn bull. He hangs out at University of Texas games. Once he charged...
...there, a Dorito?” If you can’t respect that, well, “You’re just about as useless as JPEGs to Helen Keller.” Shit son, he just went there. —Jeff W. Feldman is the incoming Music Editor. He ain’t never punched a tourist, even if he deserved...
...Tain” by the Decemberists. These Portland, Ore. indie rockers recently created an 18-minute music video for their 2004 single based on the ancient Irish epic, The Táin Bó Cúailnge (or “The Cattle Raid of Cooley”). The animation can’t quite capture the sheer ridiculousness of the story, but it does a pretty good job, particularly when it comes to the feats of the story’s hero, Cúchulainn, who’s a BAMF if ever there was one. 2. Fleet Foxes. The album...