Word: myrrh
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When the ancient Assyrians felt the painful aftereffects of excess merriment, they consumed a mixture of ground birds' beaks and myrrh. European doctors in the Middle Ages recommended raw eel and bitter almonds. Mongolians ate pickled sheep's eyes, while China went with a more palatable dose of green tea. Germans still eat Katerfruhstuck, a postbinge breakfast that usually consists of herring, pickles and goulash. Russians don't eat anything at all; they jump in a sauna and sweat it all out, sometimes flagellating themselves with birch branches to aid blood flow...
...Italian Bernardino Branca developed a cure-all he called Fernet - an 80-proof concoction containing myrrh (what's with all the myrrh?), rhubarb, chamomile, aloe, cardamom, peppermint oil and a number of other ingredients including a lot of grape-infused spirits and some opiates. Branca used the drink to treat a number of ailments, including hangovers and cholera. Fernet is still available (now opiate-free), although it's usually served as an after dinner drink...
...work. Hangovers exist for a reason - your mouth is dry because you're dehydrated. Your eyes are red because you probably didn't sleep very well, and your body is sore because you just drank something that is basically poisonous. No amount of Worcestershire sauce, egg yolk or myrrh can change the fact that five hours ago, you were downing lemon drops and dancing on top of a bar to music by KC and the Sunshine Band. So take a shower, have something to eat, and try not to do it again. Well, until next year...
...Weleda Foot Balm If the reek of your feet won't be defeated by routine washing, clean socks or even new shoes, Weleda Foot Balm may be the antifunk weapon for you. I first tried it because the company, named for a Germanic healer and priestess, claimed that the myrrh ingredient had antibacterial qualities. I kept using it because of its light lemongrass smell - and because it absorbs quickly, so you don't have to worry about slip-sliding away on the bathroom floor. And now my feet don't stink. Price...
...DECADES, PILGRIMS flocked to the Christ of the Hills monastery in Blanco, Texas, to lay eyes on what founder Samuel Greene Jr. and his fellow monks claimed was a miracle: a painting of the Virgin Mary that wept tears of myrrh. In 2000, after a fellow monk was convicted of indecency with a male monastic student, Greene also pleaded guilty to indecency. When the compound was closed, investigators found eyedroppers and bottles of rosewater used to fake the tears that prompted donations. Last year Greene confessed to the ruse, and his sexual relations with teenage students, to his probation officer...