Word: necco
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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Around the corner, the New EnglandConfectionary Company of Cambridge offered moretraditional fare. Founded in 1847, Necco is theoldest candy company in the country, according torepresentative Walter J. Marshall. The company'smost popular product is still the original Neccowafer, the chalky flavored discs that inauguratedthe company...
...Willy Wonka Theory. Okay, so the candy recipes are top secret. Not only that, but I'm not supposed to see any Oompa Loompa guys running around because I'll report Necco for violating child labor laws...
...Disappointing Truth Theory. There's nothing to see, after all. Necco is ashamed that their conversation hearts are--well--easy to make (3 T. sugar, 1 t. dye, 1 t. chalk dust. Yield: one conversation heart). They're afraid to let me see that the catchy sayings are not generated by the whimsy of a human mind but by a gigantic, humorless computer, nicknamed "The Lovemaster...
...Humbug/Love Sucks Theory. Necco's not letting me into the factory because the CEO is an unfeeling cold fish. He made the "no tours policy" because he's bitter and he thinks that Valentine's Day is sappy. For years he's lived a personal hell of coming up with cutesy sayings for other people's corny love lives. Every night he comes home from work, watches "Love Connection," and laughs until the tears roll down his cheeks...
Come on, Mr. Necco Bigwig. Get rid of your attitude problem. It's Valentine's Day; it's the season for romance. Have a heart! (Whoa--sorry). Oh, Chief Executive Officer, haven't you ever been in love...