Word: needful
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This is a catchy sentence designed to make you read the following article. It will be followed by something slightly off-putting, like "Want to watch a video that features a special-needs child with a trendy, topical disease?" No need to be offended, though, for this next sentence explains the off-putting remark, and that special-needs child is one of the stereotypical movie characters featured in A Trailer for Every Academy Award-Winning Movie Ever Made - a Cracked.com video produced by the comedy duo Britanick...
...this paragraph you'll learn that the video is a trailer for a fictional movie featuring an affluent white man, his female love interest, his special-needs brother (now does the first sentence make sense?), a Latin-American teenager who needs help believing in himself, and a wrongfully convicted black man. Basically, everything you need to win the Best Picture Oscar at the Academy Awards...
...People think that Americans are notorious consumers and will shift very quickly back to their old habits, but we're not so sure about that," says Eshelman. He speculates that because of the number of jobs that would need to be added each month, it will likely take five to 10 years for employment to return to 2007 levels. In December 2009, the country's seasonally adjusted employment was at 129.5 million, down 8.5 million jobs from its peak in December 2007. Even if 150,000 jobs were added every month, it would take five years to return...
...overuse of risky interventions like inducing labor and delivering via cesarean section. "Women are not dying from complex, mysterious causes that we don't know how to treat," says Strauss. "Women are dying because it's a fragmented system, and they are not getting the comprehensive services that they need...
...vote; there are, after all, probably twice as many Shi'ites as there are Sunnis in Iraq's electorate, even though hundreds of thousands more Sunnis appear to have voted this time compared with 2005's turnout. But Maliki is unlikely to win a majority, and would need coalition partners - perhaps from among the Kurdish nationalist parties that again polled strongly enough in their own areas to potentially earn a kingmaking role in Baghdad, or from the Sadrists and other Shi'ite Islamist parties, or even from Allawi's bloc. But Allawi has alleged widespread fraud by his opponent...