Word: nhl
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Dates: during 2000-2009
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...know the Great One was such a trash talker, or that he uses exclamation points like a 15-year-old girl. See, in hockey you can even make fun of one of the greatest players ever! Try that on Mike Tyson. (Read "Why No One Is Seeing the NHL's Great Game.") Time.com Poll Should Joel Stein be banned from writing about hockey...
...friend-of-the-court essay written to advance my cause, director Kevin Smith argued that hockey has "Heroes! Villains! Costumes! Masks! Fights! It's a comic book come to life ... at any moment, someone might try to punch someone else in the face!" Oddly, NHL commissioner Gary Bettman was less effusive. When I asked him to sell his sport, he pointed out, "The players all grow playoff beards. It's their commitment to the cause, the bond of the team." But Bettman did add that anyone who watches "Washington play Pittsburgh and sees Ovechkin play Crosby" will catch hockey fever...
...Three-time Stanley Cup champion Brendan Shanahan, the NHL's active goal-scoring leader, argued that while NHL players are often accused of being boring and Canadian, many are not even Canadian. I asked Shanahan for an exciting fact about himself, and he thought for a moment. "I have a photographic memory in any sort of movie game," he said. I pressed him for something else: "My beard grows every three hours and looks completely gray. I make Brett Favre look young." Seriously, the NHL has got to abandon this beard campaign...
...this working? Because I haven't even mentioned the fact that the NHL will let me do things no sport that doesn't involve animals will. I've played goalie at a New York Islanders practice even though I can't skate. I've brought the Stanley Cup to a pawnshop. The league has even offered to let me be commissioner for a day. When I pitched that last idea, Josh said, "If the NHL would let you be commissioner for a year, we'd have something. Because then you'd change that stupid sport...
...This is what NHL commissioner Gary Bettman doesn't understand. You can't put hockey into every major city in America, because hockey isn't woven into the fabric of the American quilt the way it is woven into the Canadian toque. Canadian billionaire and hockey nut Jim Balsillie knows this - which is why he's making his third attempt to purchase a NHL team ... seemingly against the NHL's wishes. (Read "Why No One Is Seeing the NHL's Great Game...