Word: noam
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...toupee. The distinction between balding, foreign men and our top professors being pretty sketchy, The Hat caught on quickly as a sign of the oldest guard of the Intellectual Elite (It's rumored that all eight University professors received new Hats upon their appointment, and precocious Professor of Mathematics Noam Elkies owned several at the tender age of eight). This theory is feasible only at Harvard, where fashion trends sparked by old intellectual men could actually catch...
...Noam Elkies?" you wonder...
...tender age of 27, Noam Elkies became Harvard's youngest-ever tenured professor in 19993. But there's more to Elkies than an incredible talent for mathematics--he's an accomplished musician with a unique sense of humor...
...heard a rumor at the time concerning the illustrious MIT professor (and language-maven) Noam Chomsky. According to anonymous sources (i.e. my imagination), Chomsky circulated a devastating manifesto warning of a universal linguistic apocalypse if Harvard allowed its department to dissolve into oblivion. Needless to say, as I flipped through the current Courses of Instruction, the Linguistics department was still there...
...Linnaean String Quartet, a group of four musicians from the class of 1995, followed Brown's address with their performance of "Anthem," a movement of a piece composed by Professor of Mathematics Noam D. Elkies. Elkies based the movement on James Weldon Johnson's "Lift Ev'ry Voice and Sing...