Word: oatmealization
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...stores are in California, where the housing market is particularly harsh and where unemployment is at a 15-year high. Jamba announced plans to cut $25 million in costs for 2009, while opening 50 franchise outlets at colleges, airports and malls. To spark sales, the company has introduced oatmeal to its breakfast menu. Can that lift a struggling chain? Unfortunately, you probably shouldn't bet on it. These days, who has enough money for oatmeal...
...arrive and take their seats at the table, the chairman (what? don't your dinner parties have a chairman?) asks them to stand and receive the haggis. Everyone rises as the entrée of entrails - haggis is made by stuffing a sheep's heart, liver and lungs along with oatmeal and spices into the stomach lining, so that it looks like an oddly distended football - arrives on a platter, usually with a bagpipe band following behind. Someone then gives a boisterous rendition of one of Burns' poems, "Address to a Haggis." When he recites the line about cutting the food...
...much influence can cookbook authors really have over the way people eat in America? I've always thought if you could get people to cook, they would eat more sanely. That's kind of where it's at for me. To me it's incredible that something like instant oatmeal exists when normal oatmeal takes six minutes to cook. Starbucks is now selling what amounts to instant oatmeal for four bucks. People can make oatmeal for 20 cents. Just getting people to make themselves oatmeal in the morning - I think that's a pretty noble goal...
...Your Oats. Jamba Juice is introducing oatmeal to the menu nationwide (it's already been previewed in Chicago stores) in January, giving Starbucks a run for your breakfast dollar. Unlike Starbucks', Jamba's oatmeal is slow-cooked, not instant, and you'll have a choice of fruit toppings - apple-cinnamon crumble, blueberry-blackberry or fresh banana...
Every presidential election year Family Circle magazine runs a cookie recipe contest between the two possible First Ladies. The winner of the contest for the past four elections has gone on to be (or continued to be) the First Lady. This year, Cindy McCain's Oatmeal-Butterscotch cookies beat out Michelle Obama's shortbread cookies. A cookie contest for our First Lady? Archaic? Ridiculous? Well then, how 'bout a dance-off between the candidates themselves? This virtual throwdown between John McCain and Barack Obama should at least take your mind off the 1950s flashback with a little bit of crumpin...