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Still, I have very few complaints, the only big one being that the dining-hall services stopped serving scrod on a regular basis after I sent them a heart-felt letter telling them how much I enjoyed it. Sometimes I think about it and start coughing violently with emotion, usually because I am forgetting to swallow something else that I am eating at the time...
...dorm furnishings had strong moral objections to people sitting down, which explains why all the chairs gang up on you whenever you try to lean back, but I don’t know why he would have wanted fecal coliforms all over everything in the restroom. Maybe he had one as a pet and got attached...
People often tell me that their college years were the best years of their lives. Admittedly, some of these people live in that area outside of the Coop and spend all day sitting in one position holding a cardboard sign with grammatical errors. But if Harvard has taught me one thing, it is that you should always be polite to the people who try to instigate conversations with you at Starbucks, because you will wind up running into them a year later, and they will remember everything you told them the last time about your imaginary sister...
...would like to say that I regret nothing of the past four years. Actually, I do regret one thing: not having donated one of my eggs to those people who advertise in The Crimson, because, hey, that’s serious money. But then I worry that my kid would be raised by people who think it’s okay to advertise for eggs in a college newspaper...
...addition of five new buildings since 2006, which included energy-intensive lab space, account for half its utilities costs and increased its greenhouse gas emissions by one percent, according to FAS Director of Operations Jay M. Phillips...