Word: oneness
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...most important battle of anyone's life is when sperm meets egg. It's Darwin at its most elemental, your genes vs. hers. One person goes on to the next round of the species, and the other goes to the grave a loser for all eternity. This is why sex is practiced in the style it often...
...inherited lack of rhythm. But with just a vial of spit each from Cassandra, myself and Laszlo, I could find out with DNA-lab-tested certainty which of us had influenced our child more. And for those of you worried about our putting him through this, know that the one thing babies look kindly upon donating is their drool. Especially when your last bodily request was for their foreskin. (See How You Can Change Your Genes...
...normal person, Cassandra's genetic results are excellent: a very low chance of getting Parkinson's, breast cancer or ovarian cancer and a good chance of becoming a professional sprinter. But there was one recent study that implied that one of her DNA sequences might signify a slightly higher risk of obesity. This meant that for a week, my very thin wife walked around the house throwing away various items like cookies, which she called obesity makers...
Unfortunately, Mountain informed me, no one has yet mapped the gene for awesomeness, but she was able to look up a bunch of stuff. And when she looked more closely at the data, she discovered that the traits Laszlo inherited from me kind of sucked...
...increasingly global workforce. Obama would define school success by how much improvement students make from grade to grade, no matter where they started, as opposed to the current system, in which schools are judged on students' absolute performance, not their progress. Obama's model is similar to the one we pioneered three years ago here in New York City, where we give schools an A-to-F grade based on how well they're helping their students acquire skills. The grades help focus schools on a clear set of expectations and are one way we hold them accountable. Principals...