Word: optimus
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...played with “Star Wars” androids as a child? It’s okay; we did too. Once. 15 years ago (translation: between Episodes VI and I). A childhood celebrating Optimus Prime, a socially unfulfilling adolescence, a stunning but dateless rendition of the robot at prom—these are all things that got you into Harvard. But it’s time to leave them behind and upgrade to YOU v2.0. The robots, mega-bots, and Ca-BOTs must...
...robot aliens, as well. If either Mudflap or Skids, a pair of new characters who speak in an appallingly offensive ghetto patois, were my victims, I could live with myself. The world doesn't need more versions of Jar Jar Binks. But what if it were the Autobot leader, Optimus Prime? Optimus truly cares about the future of the human race, unlike the Obama Administration, which Bay represents as so prissy and antiwar it just wants the alien robots off the planet. Bay's Obama would probably drive his Prius over Optimus if he had the chance. But no problem...
...crew of children reduce your home to rubble and conduct endless bouts of loud war on the living-room floor while you ponder the propriety of opening a bottle of wine. On occasions like that, another set of parents, no matter how irritating, can be as welcome as Optimus Prime rising from the dead...
Rooming: Concrete and spacious. While Mather House may look like the bastard child of Optimus Prime and a cement truck…well, isn’t that pretty badass? While the non-initiate might call it an "eyesore" or "big block of fugly," any Matherite will tell you that the exterior is redeemed by an enviable interior. Every resident is guaranteed a "cozy" single within a suite, eliminating the numbing isolation and social depravity of those lonely Quad singles. In the low-rise, sophomores and juniors get two-story suites with 4-6 singles and a party-friendly common...
...voice actor familiar to the teensiest fraction of moviegoers. With Steven Spielberg producing and Michael Bay directing this $150 million effects-ravaganza about dueling alien robot races, the protagonist could have been Will Smith or magazine-cover bait like Justin Timberlake. But Cullen was the voice of the character Optimus Prime in the Transformers TV show, a treasured part of the canon for true fans. (If the phrase "robots in disguise" sets your toes atappin', you may be one of them...