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Instead of reality TV stars posing in bikinis and push-up bras, each week’s FM features a bizarre full-page spread of chronic masturbators and generally unattractive people acting like complete heathen lords and reenacting scenes from Gorillas in the Mist. Sometimes they are making out, which is sort of like pornography except that it tricks your genitals into thinking you have just gone swimming in Maine. Also, the photographs require no consent so they’re like that creepy—voyeur—porn that scary people...
...Take proofing FM, for example. By the time I get my hands on a page on Tuesday night, it’s already been devoured by dozens of eyes. Hours have been poured into comp seminars to instruct the writer on how to interview sources and structure the story. After editing, a slightly improved version emerges that still has to jump the hurdles of further inspection. While writers and editors sweat through words, designers and photographers unite to make the page look appealing, obsessing over spacing and lines. By the time the story reaches my desk, always later than...
...restroom in Sever, the location of his red phone. Sam Teller: In section, you once said, “Reality is an illusion created by the proto-industrialist class of late 17th-century Europe.” What’s your favorite color? That Kid: To summarize, on page 476, Foucault says… ST: We didn’t read Foucalt for this class. TK: Right, but, the thing about my comprehensive knowledge of the underside of monkey brains is… ST: This is an English class… TK: Right, but, about the fundamental misattribution error?...
Wendy has been with us longest and knows our feet-dragging ways best. Her tendency toward funny jokes (see page 19), alliteration (see page 19), and not treating The Crimson like it’s the be-all and end-all (see page 19) makes her presence enjoyable. Why did Widman cross the road...
...student opinion due to “two key endorsements from The Crimson and Native Americans at Harvard College.”The fact is that the average reader learned of The Crimson’s endorsement only after reading the much more prominently displayed and ostensibly impartial front-page information, including the article in question. Whatever The Crimson’s reputation as kingmaker, it is untenable to attribute retroactive influence to an endorsement many have yet to read. Furthermore, with no objective data to back its claim that Haddock has fallen off the pace, The Crimson has entered...