Word: pdas
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...still young in the time when Albert, Creator of the Great Net, battled Prince W of Austin for dominion of the land. In those days we carried the first devices called PDAs, for Personal Digital Assistants, but some of us knew their power and in time called them Personal Downtime Annihilators...
...first PDAs were used for slave work, like the putting in and the getting out of addresses, which was how humans found one another in days before the Implanting of the chips. Also therein they stored their kalendars, which was how they knew to be somewhere and when to be there. This was in the days of the going about, before the Final Connecting, which did away with the need for the going about...
...Siliconns, a great tribe that dwelt in the valley beside the great western ocean, made the PDAs connect to one another. And there was much connecting and rejoicing, especially among the Startups, high priests and votaries of eyepeeoh, who controlled Heaven and Earth in the time when Lord Nazdak made men fat. And later, thin...
...PDAs became smarter, so too did their power over humans increase. The PDAs spoke to one another through the satellites, which made the trilling sound. And it was amazing...
Humans said to their PDAs, "Heat my house, for I am on my way home. Alert me when the Williams and the Sonoma mark down by a 40th portion the things that make the gluten strands. Why is my stock so low? Get my broker out of the shower, or the flushing place, and tell him that I am wroth!" Or, "I am fatigued from the going-out of the caffeine. Lead me to the temple of Starbuck." And they would guide cars there. And it was amazing...