Word: petted
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Dates: during 1980-1989
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People who think pachyderms are intrinsically funny will find the rest of Suder sidesplitting. Renoir certainly provokes his share of double takes. The man robbed by Suder tracks him to a cabin in Oregon, where he notices the large pet: "What's that?" Suder's reply: "That's an elephant." And then there is the joke about Suder's manager, an amateur taxidermist, who shows up unexpectedly and tries to kill Renoir with a chain saw: "I can't wait to stuff this sucker." By now, Suder has acquired other eccentricities. His cabin mate...
Under Veterinary Pet Insurance, a program started by a group of 700 California vets, dogs and cats up to 15 years old can be covered against accidents such as poisonings and auto injuries (cost: $19 a year). For complete health coverage, a major medical plan runs from $44 to $109 a year, depending on the pet's age. The policies will pay for surgery, dental work, X-rays, even chemotherapy treatments for animals with cancer...
Veterinary Pet Insurance recently paid a claim of $750, the maximum, on a $1,600 bill to perform open-chest surgery on a Gordon setter. Since the company started in April 1982, it has collected more than $850,000 in premiums from 15,000 policyholders. About 75% of customers have renewed their policies. Among the pets insured are the video dog Lassie and Hugh Hefner's pair of English sheep dogs. Veterinary Pet Insurance so far does not cover Hefner's bunnies...
...Where's my pet monkey Mimi?" squeaked an elderly woman wrapped in a bright myself kimono. "Someone's stolen my wallet, and I can't buy myself a train ticket home," moaned a lanky teenager. "My man's drunk again and beating me!" screamed a woman over the telephone. [Help!] Hayaku...
...Make it quick!]" For the two officers stationed at the Ochanomizu police box in the heart of Tokyo, the complaints were typical. Within 15 minutes they had soothed the be reft woman with a promise to be on the lookout for her pet (it was found), lent the penniless youth 560 yen ($2.33) from a special emergency fund in exchange for a signed IOU (four out of five such loans are repaid) and radioed for a patrol car to break up the marital battle. Said Sergeant Shigeo Takahashi, grinning with satisfaction: "You stand here for a quarter of an hour...