Word: placentas
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There is so much you can't know about your spouse when you get married, like that one day she will want to eat her placenta. But there are two things you don't argue about with a pregnant woman: what she eats and that being full of life indeed looks sexy. So when Cassandra told me that for $275, a woman would come to our house, cook Cassandra's placenta, freeze-dry it and turn it into capsules to help ward off postpartum depression and increase milk supply, I said, "$275 is a bargain compared with...
Most mammals, Cassandra explained, eat their placentas, to which I countered that most dogs eat their poop. I stopped arguing there, figuring that like many of Cassandra's hippie ideas - the compost bin, rubbing lemon on her underarms instead of deodorant - she'd give up on this in a few weeks. Even as the due date approached and she was still set on eating her placenta, I couldn't imagine that she'd remember to request it from the doctor after the most physically draining experience of her life. This is a woman who, 9 times out of 10, forgets...
Though I am exceedingly squeamish, when my son was born, I was shocked that I saw only the beauty of childbirth. Until the placenta came out. There are many normal human reactions to seeing a placenta, ranging from screaming to vomiting to warding it off with a cross. For those of you who have never seen one, the placenta is to the baby what Stephen Baldwin is to Alec Baldwin. It's what your liver would look like if it got into an accident on the autobahn with one of those aliens from Mars Attacks! and their bloody carcasses threw...
...seminar, will be graded. All police departments are not like HUPD. After you are caught breaking the law, they will not bring you back to your room to help destroy the evidence and smooth things out with the Ad Board. (Thanks, Officer Thompson. You were right: it was mostly placenta anyway.)Still, it’s been a wild ride. Enriched by the core, we can now answer questions like, “Are numbers magical? Is this art and/or literature I’m encountering an A, B or C? What would this look like as a Japanese woodblock...
...theory, that blast of stress chemistry could alter the development of the fetal locus coeruleus, though Purpura is quick to point out that the study showing how cortisol can make it through the placenta was conducted in animals, not humans. Nonetheless, one day after their article in Brain Research Reviews was published, the journal Psychoneuroendocrinology published a study linking cortisol imbalance to Asperger's syndrome, a condition along the autism spectrum...