Word: polston
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...Betty Polston and her husband Bernie were finishing dinner at their kitchen table one night in 1990 when Bernie announced that after 30 years, he was retiring from his law practice. Betty's reaction was physical: her throat tightened and her stomach churned. "I knew that financially we'd be fine," Betty says. "But that didn't mean I was ready for my husband--Bernie the Attorney--to retire. He didn't have any hobbies. He's very laid back. I had visions of him napping, reading newspapers and lying around the patio for the rest of his life...
...kinds of issues can arise--from how much time to spend together and how to divide the housework to how to help the retired spouse find a new, non-work-related identity. And as couples live longer, the quality of their relationships becomes even more important, says therapist Polston. But while "everyone has a financial plan for retirement, and a health plan, no one bothers to make a relationship plan," she says. "We're going to live 20, 30, 40 more years in a retirement relationship. We'd better figure...
...Betty Polston nervously anticipated her husband's retirement because she knew how much of his self-worth was invested in his career, and she wondered where he would direct his energies after that career ended. She also knew to prepare for the everyday problems that can catch couples off guard. "We made a point to talk about the housework issue before it became an issue," Polston says. "Bernie hadn't ever helped around the house since we got married. But now it made sense for him to take on some chores." It was agreed that Bernie would make his lunch...
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