Word: premedicus
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...Gonzo (Premedicus Enthusiastus)--These premeds define their lives by how far they have advanced in the premed sequence. Their strategy is simple: They choose those courses they have taken, and aced, in high school. For those classes they haven't already mastered, they read the entire textbook the previous summer...
...Classic (Premedicus Backstabus)--This notorious species of premed, feared by all phyla of preprofessionals, violates all codified premed mores. They fiendishly slice out copies of past years' final exams from library bound volumes, using scalpels smuggled from their labs. They magnetize videotapes of past lectures. These future physicians have even been known to pour acid on classmates' notes when they go to the bathroom...
...Jolly (Premedicus Dweebus)--Members of this species, comprising a plurality of premeds, think reading period is the high point of the academic year. In reading period, they point out, they don't have to attend non-science classes. They can bask in their pre-med notes hour after hour like pigs in the slops...
...Nosy (Premedicus Proboscus)--These premeds love to check out the competition, even if it means spending hours matching names with I.D. numbers on the list of test grades...
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