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...under the cloud of the current crisis, the tipping point may have been reached. Some gay priests, unable to stomach the ingratitude after their years of service, say the comments may force them to walk away from a job they excel at. Many others are stepping further back into the closet, deeper into a world of secrecy, shame and isolation--the very dark place where priestly dysfunction can breed. "At once I get very angry about it and also very hurt," says a gay New Jersey priest who was ordained 19 years ago. "It's very much like being rejected...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Inside The Church's Closet | 5/20/2002 | See Source »

...when Jay Pinkerton, now 53, entered the Washington Theological Coalition in Silver Spring, Md., he knew he was gay. He had wanted to be a priest for a reason common among older gay clergy. "I knew I didn't want to get married, and I loved the church," he says. "I had thought about it since I was a kid, and it felt like a safe place. I wouldn't have to worry about my sexuality. Nobody would expect that I would date...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Inside The Church's Closet | 5/20/2002 | See Source »

What he didn't know was that so many other gay men had made the same choice. Pinkerton was part of a religious community called the Franciscans. Compared with diocesan priests, religious communities--which are usually not under the close watch of a bishop and a parish--generally attract more gay men. Pinkerton's community of East Coast Franciscans included about 400 men; he estimates that about 250 to 300 were gay. He didn't figure that out, though, until after he was ordained, he says. He soon found himself seated at the "gay-priest table" at a celebration...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Inside The Church's Closet | 5/20/2002 | See Source »

...ordained priest, Pinkerton found himself doing what he calls "the tap dance" to reconcile committing his life to an institution that was not unconditionally committed to him. By 1984 he was completely out to his brother friars, whom he describes as open and supportive. But in October of 1986 he stopped celebrating Mass after the release of a Vatican directive (later dubbed the Halloween letter) that called homosexuality an "objective disorder" and warned that society should not be surprised if violence were committed against gays and lesbians seeking civil rights. After several months of reflection, Pinkerton managed to talk himself...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Inside The Church's Closet | 5/20/2002 | See Source »

...more often than not, says psychologist Michael Mendola, a former priest whose practice focuses on gay clergy, "it's extremely difficult for a gay priest to have a relationship and be happy. They begin to question their authenticity...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Inside The Church's Closet | 5/20/2002 | See Source »

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