Word: respecting
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...lower tolerance for children looking disrespectful," says Pam Jackson, an economist and single mother in Washington. Wilma Ann Anderson, publisher of Mahogany Baby, an online magazine for black parents, and a mother of four, agrees. When a white woman goes out with four children, Anderson says, she instantly commands respect. "When I go out with my four kids, I feel like if they misbehave, people think I'm a welfare...
...Neil Gussman's three children, it took a maximum of three spankings for them not to need spanking anymore. "If they have that experience early, they don't want to repeat it," says the communications manager and former tank commander. Gussman, 52, recalls having little respect for his mother, who used negotiation as her primary disciplinary tool, but plenty for his father, who spanked him once--memorably. Gussman was 5 when he played in a forbidden swamp near his home in Stoneham, Mass. "I had scared him half to death," says Gussman of his father, an ex-boxer. "He spanked...
...some African Americans are disturbed by the culture of discipline. "I started analyzing whether by spanking, I want my children to fear or respect me," says Anderson. "My parents taught respect by fear. And there's a historical aspect to this--slaves were taught via physical reprimand and that was passed down." Complicating the matter are studies that show that what some still call a good whuppin' may not be so psychologically harmful in black families. But critics reply that saying it's O.K. for black children but not white kids to be spanked reinforces societal racism...
...American citizens have any respect for those retired generals who spent their careers at the public trough and now want to destroy the boss they sucked up to while in command? They need to spend their time playing golf and leave the important decisions to our elected leaders. JOEL EPPERSON Birmingham...
...problem solve and to engage socially." She also feels that the ABA emphasis on "looking normal" doesn't address the reasons for behaviors like flapping and rocking: "Those are organizing strategies to cope with anxiety. Our philosophy is not to say 'Don't do that.' In DIR, we respect them for who they are but give them the tools they need for successful lives." Sometimes literally: Osgood tosses a boy a Koosh ball when he asks for something to fiddle with in his hand. Knowing to ask, she says, is part of learning to regulate oneself...