Word: scorpion
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...Chop Suey, but dey just like dem ones at Pat O'Brien's in dey Vieux Carre, and you drink two o'those, you say, "Doucement!," start feelin' like a nutria gettin' whomped on dey head! And I tell you what - C'est vrai, babe! - Dey teach dat Scorpion Bowl how to sting! Put one o' dem in your shoe, you gon' holler...
...Nice Duck." He waxes philosophic: "No duck is an island." When the filmmakers grow tired of fowl puns -- about an hour after the audience does -- they switch to space opera, and Howard battles a scientist (Jeffrey Jones, funny against all odds) whose body is invaded by a giant lobster-scorpion space troll. Moviegoers who are in search of a porno Zoo Parade may enjoy the bedroom tryst in which Howard's human sweetie (Lea Thompson) discovers a condom in his wallet, snuggles up and asks, "You think I might find love in the animal kingdom?" More fastidious viewers are advised...
...three-year-old Filly is merely an upstart compared to the pink Hong Kong Restaurant (1236 Mass. Ave.) which packs them in for miles. Drink the Scorpion Bowl, a tropical concoction of supposed fruit juices and phantom alcohol. It will take a couple of these to get buzzed but by that time you'll be broke...
...never gleamed so spiffily as at Dolly Parton's new Dollywood in Pigeon Forge, Tenn. Country music rarely sounded so all-fired wholesome as it does at Nashville's Opryland. No city zoo ever boasted rides like the Congo River Rapids, the Stanleyville Falls flume or the vertigo-inducing Scorpion--all to be found at Busch Gardens in Tampa. Early Christians never found accommodations as plush as the ones at the "21st century Christian campground" of Heritage USA near Fort Mill, S.C. As for the twin fountainheads of theme parks--Disneyland in Anaheim, Calif., and the gigantic Walt Disney World...
Right around the corner is The Hong Kong (1236 Mass. Ave), Harvard's little touch of Trader Vic's, the famous Polynesian restaurant. You should proceed immediately up the stairs, past the off-duty cops and the bouncers and dive into one of the Kong's famous Scorpion bowls. After one night of bowl consumption, you'll probably find out that the Square's largest drink contains little alcohol, a big price tag, and packs an awful headache with only a minor buzz. But like Steve's ice cream, you have to try it at least once in your lifetime...