Word: shaq
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...sector eagerly rooting for a comeback: athletic-apparel makers, who dream of a rerun of the mid-'90s Brand Jordan boom. You would too if your marketing fortunes were tethered to lesser hoop gods like Kobe, Shaq and Iverson. Jordan jerseys and T shirts are being ordered, sneakers designed, copy written in anticipation. "Michael Jordan coming back isn't even a national event," gushes an apparel executive. "It's global. He's a huge, free-standing business, and he pulls the rest of us along with him." Of course, if anything is dampening enthusiasm, it's the Wizards dull image...
TYRONN LUE Unknown 6-ft. Laker in shadow of Shaq soars in play-offs as man who slowwwed Iverson...
...bottom of the ninth would say, "Aw, I was just lucky to hit that curve." But Muhammad Ali and Joe Namath changed all that. With Ali's "I am the greatest" speeches and Joe Namath's confident predictions of victories, sports etiquette was altered forever. In the NBA finals, Shaq pounded his opponents in print as much as he pounded them on the court...
...76ers will then win the next four games, taking the series in six. Shaq will attempt infanticide but will ultimately fail when threatened by Kobe’s basketball-playing Sicilian connections. Despite Kobe’s 47 points-per-game scoring average in the Finals, he will be traded back to the Charlotte Hornets (the team that drafted him) for Derrick Coleman...
...Shaq will quit the Lakers, realizing his true talents lie on the stage rather than on the court. His off-Broadway one-man-show, entitled “Kazaam II: Shaq-Diesel Slams in the House,” will gross more money than any other off-Broadway show that starred a 320-pound NBA player in modern history. Phil Jackson will resign as head coach and the world will suddenly realize that Jerry Buss and Jerry West are actually Jerry Krause and Jerry Reinsdorf...