Word: shemmer
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Dates: during 1999-1999
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...list matters because the stock market is every analyst's favorite hobby. Shemmer and the other analysts trade stock prices like sports scores, bragging loudly about their stocks from their desks. Shemmer has more than $11,000 of his own money invested in the market, mostly in risky, especially volatile "penny stocks" that can be bought in huge quantities. "Make your fucking move!" he shouts at one dawdling stock. But he's proud of a company called Zamba, which started out in the morning at $5 a share. It's up to $5.50 by the time he settles down...
...analyst's job is all about research, and we quickly settle into the morning routine. The high-tech world at the end of the millennium is a vast free-for-all, with companies scrambling to acquire one another and grow exponentially. Shemmer's job is to sift through thousands of unknown firms and select likely acquisitions for his client, a software company. The client is looking to expand its operations in the Northeast and Shemmer wants to present them with as broad a menu as possible...
...Shemmer already has a list of potential targets this morning, compiled from every possible source--ads, word-of-mouth from friends, industry newsletters, random searches on the Web, even advice from competitors. Creativity pays off. One analyst hunts down computer science majors at MIT to find out where graduates are headed. As we browse one start-up's Web site, Shemmer notices that its on-line customer response forms are maintained by a company he's never heard of. That company immediately goes on the list...
...search is efficient, even brutal. If Shemmer can't deduce what a company's Web address might be, it's history. "That's it," he says. "I might ask someone, but..." One target's Web site is unattractive and poorly designed, lacking basic information about management and investors. Shemmer sends them a curt e-mail telling them to shape up, then moves on. With practice, the culling goes quickly, Shemmer says. "There's a ton of shitty companies out there. It's like 80-20." Once he identifies a likely prospect, Shemmer places a call to the CEO for more...
...friend from Penn calls. A senior, he's considering taking a job with one of the big downtown banks. Shemmer is indignant. "Ninety percent of the analysts hate it," he tells his friend, a fraternity buddy. "There's no guarantee you're going to make more money." His friend wavers, and Shemmer hones in. Shemmer instinctively organizes his pitch into bullets and subpoints, neatly lining up Broadview's advantages and the competitor's downsides like he might at a client presentation. It's a habit of the analyst mind. Later, when a new co-worker asks...