Word: sicked
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When Claire Michaels, a former actress and teacher, made the acquaintance of Main Street Legal Services, her life was at low ebb. "I was disabled and I was poor and I was very sick," she recalls. "There was a possibility that I might not survive the illness I had, and I wanted to have a will and a living will." Michaels, 71, had read in the paper that the City University of New York (CUNY) had an elder-law clinic. "They came here to my home to help me," she says, still amazed. "The professor was very concerned about...
...straight shot at Gore's central weakness, the impression he gives voters that he doesn't quite know who he is. True populists who were sick of Clinton's slushy Third Way claptrap love all that fighting talk. But if they really want action, it's Nader who's proposing a Marshall Plan for the inner cities and an $8.50 minimum wage. Instead Gore promises tax credits for college and making that commute a little easier and a prescription-drug entitlement for every grandma. But the gentle program aimed right at the swing voters gets lost because they...
...kids! Can you guess what time it is? That's right: it's toon-time! Time to join the wacky bunch of characters in Spike and Mike's Sick and Twisted Festival of Animation! Join such goofy characters as Radioactive Crotch Man and his squad of Erect Nipple Man, Coma Man and Old Man Man as they battle the forces of the evil Butt Pirate! See how Coko the Junkie Pimp relearns the art of slapping hos after a bout of amnesia! Or find out the true Christmas story in Pussy da Red Nosed Reindeer! Don't wait; start begging...
...good taste ends there. Just as you begin to think that the festival isn't really that sick, on comes a "Birth of Abomination" flick in which a buck-toothed, blue-haired individual named Motormouth swallows the newborn infant of a prostitute, leaving the umbilical cord dangling from his mouth like a string of spaghetti. And then comes the "Sloaches(tm) Fun House." I'm not even getting into the "Sloaches(tm) Fun House"-The Crimson, after all, is a family paper...
...Everyone says they're sick of this," he says. "But do you know what the highest-rated TV show is around here? It's the replay of the Monday night council meetings Tuesday nights on local cable." The mayor is willing to bet his best rod and reel that few Westlanders tuned in to the third presidential debate last week. They were watching their city council soap opera...