Word: siddhartha
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...impossible, however, to leave Conrad Rooks's filmed Siddhartha without gingerly reaching for one's wallet to make sure it's still there. This unspeakable insult to the cinema and to the India it depicts has all the imaginative variety of a Hare Krishna marathon in Harvard Square, and the P.T. Barnum mentality lately put to profitable use by a noted fifteen-year old mob leader who drives a Rolls-Royce. Never has the search for eternal cosmic wisdom been so short (an hour and a half), seemed so long (an eternity), and revealed so little...
...long time, the camera finds the cattle, and immediately pans in on the cloven hooves scuffing through the dusty soil. Thereby Rooks has introduced what turns out to be a major motif in the movie--feet. The film's fascination with this part of the anatomy is endless. When Siddhartha pads solemnly through the forest in search of you know what, we become familiar with his dirty toes. And when Siddhartha has 'crossed the river" (this, by the way, is symbolic) into the fleshpots of the city, countless heels dance decadently across expensive rugs...
People are forever telling Siddhartha how clever he is, and this is without a doubt one of his moments of genius. The phrase "great deal" is crucial: "alot" would have been too flippant; no contractions allowed, no "don'ts" and "gimmes" when you're searching for the Truth. But the part about learning from the river is more telling...
...never learn what it is that everyone is so excited and enlightened about. With this unfortunate handicap, we have trouble feeling convinced when someone has a major life-transforming experience with no more warning, motivation or inducement than a wistful look or a quick crosslegged gaze into the horizon. Siddhartha and his friends, wherever they go, seem to "learn" with inordinate alacrity--they will convert immediately, throwing themselves at the feet of and dedicating their lives to someone they have known for all of 30 seconds...
...picture, when Siddhartha's lover, whom he has not seen in many moons, is dying (bitten by a cobra), she asks him, "Have you attained it?" Siddhartha doesn't even have to answer, and her eyes fill with tears of joy as she leaves for what Siddhartha pointedly observes is her own special "nirvana." Meanwhile, back in our by now very uncomfortable seats, we are wondering what the hell he has attained in the previous hour and a half, except perhaps for too much knowledge of the Kama Sutra (the audience shares this overabundance of scintillating information). Maybe this...