Word: simoniz
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Dates: during 1950-1959
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...fastest automobile race ever run, Miami's Jim Rathmann drove his Simoniz Special around the steep-banked, 2½-mile track of the new Daytona International Speedway at an average speed of 170.261 m.p.h. to win the 100-mile U.S. Automobile Club championship race, breaking his own closed-course record, which he set by winning the Monza, Italy 500-mile race last year. The speed of the race brought death to Wisconsin's George Amick, 34, No. 2 in last year's Indianapolis race. On the last lap, his Bowes Seal Fast Special went out of control...
Clean me up and Simoniz...
...random digs at classics clubs ("I, connoisseur of good reading, friend of con noisseurs of good reading everywhere"), sloppy diction ("what one weather prophet on the radio calls 'inner mitten' showers"), "personalized" writing ("As for us, we would as lief Simoniz our grandmother as personalize our writing"), usually blend good fun with good sense. Full of engaging tidbits, the "dog's breakfast" does not offer much to chew, but more than enough to tickle the taste buds...
...ignores the regularity with which the automobile kills him, maims him, embroils him with the law and provides mobile shelter for rakes intent on seducing his daughters. He takes it into his garage as fondly as an Arab leading a prize mare into his tent. He woos it with Simoniz, Prestone, Ethyl and rich lubricants - and goes broke trading it in on something flashier an hour after he has made the last payment...
That needs but love, and Simoniz...