Word: simonizes
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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...STARTED LIKE MOST JOURNEYS DO, full of idealistic hopes and dreams. MTV was having a contest --who would become the next Jesse Camp? Why not us? Why not me and my associates, Josh Simon and Aaron Cohen? Who could resist the charms of three scrawny Jewish kids moonlighting as veejays? Or, at the least, one scrawny Jewish kid. We would soon find out. Here is our story...
...Noah D. Oppenheim calls it as he sees it and tells it like it is. Joshua H. Simon and Aaron R. Cohen just go along for the ride...
...column isn't wide enough for my name to fit on one line so I become what is believed to be the first person in history to have a hyphenated byline without a hyphenated name. When I look to purchase a Crimson softball jersey, Crimson President Joshua H. Simon '00 tells me he's pretty sure my last name won't fit above my number. No, not even if they make the letters smaller and stretch them across the sleeves...
...with those warm, inviting booths, we head inside and order some breakfast. Before our whitefish salad arrives, we've all passed out. I dream of sugar plum fairies and Downtown Julie Brown. Noah D. Oppenheim calls it as he sees it and tells it like it is. Joshua H. Simon and Aaron R. Cohen just go along for the ride...
Cons: --Dylan hard to understand without an interpreter --Simon may have to share the stage with Soy Bomb --Simon's rocky relationships: three marriages, one Garfunkel...