Word: sluggers
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Dates: during 1980-1989
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Like the Giants, the Cardinals fought off injuries all season, curing their pitching rotation just in time to parry a secondary assault from Montreal. First Baseman Jack Clark, the only St. Louis slugger, has missed 24 games with a sprained ankle, and is a doubtful participant this week. An old discard, Danny Driessen, 36, has been cracking doubles in his place. Devoured by a man- eating tarpaulin in 1985, whirlwind Leftfielder Vince Coleman resolves to stay clear of the machinery this year. "I don't go anywhere anymore," he shudders, "without my tarp detector...
...even chunks on boxing in the '50s, as if the fight game had the same historical impact as the Rosenberg trial or the policies of "Engine Charley" Wilson, the Secretary of Defense. You Must Remember This takes lots of wild swings; it is what happens when a fearless slugger goes toe to toe with a big, elusive opponent...
...past, they are probably not alone. Commissioner Peter Ueberroth has been suspicious enough of corked lumber to order increased vigilance, and the bat of the Mets' Howard Johnson has already been X-rayed more than most frequent flyers. In their memoirs, the unsanitary pitcher Gaylord Perry and the unscrupulous slugger Norm Cash explained the rudiments of drooling and drilling. Well, almost every player today can read, and so many of them are handy with tools...
...good joke. One was told by the famous star Lefty ("Babe") Jabov, who once hit 62 homers in a year, more than Ruth or Maris or other inferior Americans weakened by decades of debilitating capitalist exploitation of the toiling masses. After a called third strike, the fun-loving slugger turned to the beloved umpire and quipped, "But, comrade, Marx said that when workers controlled the means of production, there would be no more strikes!" The joke was considered so funny that Jabov was not jailed at all but merely sent down to the Siberian League for attitudinal readjustment...
...happens, the slugger's younger brother Karim Jabov is a famous Soviet sports figure in his own right. Shortly after the Russian invention of soccer, the gangly Karim picked up a soccer ball and playfully thrust it back over his head into a potato basket hanging from the rafter of a people's barn. He thus simultaneously invented both the in-your-face reverse slam dunk and the entire game of basketball. Watch for the complete story in Izvestia...