Word: smiggin
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...modifications don't stop there. "We'll have live targets, something that will make a noise when it's hit," says Roy of the biathlon competition. "And we can have a kangaroo cull. God we're going to have fun." Apparently, the caravan park at Smiggin Holes has been thrown open for the athletes' village, and the local operator of a toilet cleaning business, Dougie Does Dunnies, has promised to provide the cleanest toilets of any Olympic Games in history. Jacques Rogge called the official bid film "very impressive," and the latest good news is that the Kentucky Fried Chicken...
...Smiggin Holes bid is the brainchild of Rampaging Roy Slaven and H.G. Nelson, two Australian comedians (real names John Doyle and Greig Pickhaver) who have become the media darlings of the Olympic movement. Well-known radio personalities for more than a decade in Australia, the two gained an international following during the Sydney Olympic Games with their irreverent nightly television show, "The Dream." Unimpressed with Sydney's official mascots, the boys created their own, Fatso the Fat-Arsed Wombat, which became a runaway success and was carried around the Games by the likes of Billie Jean King. Athletes clamored...
...Guests on the show received an exclusive Olympic pin - depicting a seagull skewered by a ski pole - and a T-shirt supporting the Smiggin Holes bid. So far, Tara Lipinski, Katarina Witt, Tristan Gale, Johann Koss, Alexei Yagudin, Foo Fighters lead singer Dave Grohl and Miss Utah, Jaclyn Hunt, have all been very supportive...
...will Smiggin Holes work? It already has multiple mottos - "Unleash the Mongrel," considered a big improvement on Salt Lake's lame "Light the Fire Within;" the somewhat less inspired "Winter Wonder Down Under" and the fabulous "If you've got the poles, we've got the holes...
...have bold plans for the Australian Winter Games: For starters, Australia's highest mountain, Kosciuszko, may need to be raised 1000 feet. "We've got two possibilities," says H.G. "We build a new mountain in Smiggin itself, or we build another 1000 feet on Mount Kosciusko." The new-look mountain would be named after Australia's first ever winter medallist, speed skater Zali Steggall. "We've just got to get the nation to dump all its rubbish on top of Kosciusko, compact it a bit and voila, Mount Steggall...