Word: snaporaz
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Dates: during 1980-1989
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...Snaporaz seems good-naturedly inclined to dismiss this manifest lunacy as an extreme example of the illogical, though often charming, behavior of the weaker sex. Soon, however, he is spotted by a woman, and she incites her cronies to violent retaliation against male sexual oppression, embodied in Snaporaz. Through a gymnasium bursting with women lifting weights and practicing testicle kicks he rushes, down into the fiery furnace below...
...furnace in the basement is stoked by a hideous hag, an anti-bella donna, who bundles the hapless Snaporaz onto her motorcycle and roars off with him, ostensibly to the train station. Instead, she attempts to rape him in a greenhouse, chickens squawking between them and stuffed cars reposing on a nearby table. Rescued in the nick of time by the rapist's mother, Snaporaz entrusts himself to his attacker's daughter...
...meets up with her friends down the road, and they cruise all night. Three carloads of drugged, glassy-eyed, wild-haired teenage girls lurch along dirt roads, frenetic music stimulating them like an electric cattle prod into disjointed spasms. Snaporaz eventually flees, panicked, into the pleasure palace of Dr. Xavier Zuberkock, an aging Bacchanalian who calls to mind the incoherent but dynamic Mynheer Peeperkorn of Mann's Magic Mountain...
Zubercock's residence, fashioned after the Roman decadent style, contains all manner of sexual appliances--12-inch vibrators, lamps with tongues, ad infinitum--as well as a gallery chronicling the good doctor's 9,999 conquests. Snaporaz browses, flipping switches and enjoying the recordings of female groans, grunts, and squeals of pleasure, and then joins in the celebration of Zubercock's ten-thousandth performance. A troop of policewomen sporting highheeled boots and skin-tight, wicked uniforms disperses the party prematurely...
Worn out and befuddled, Snaporaz is tucked into bed by two girls in go-go costumes. He hears giggling nearby, and crawls under the bed to investigate. A spin along a velvet-lined roller coaster track treats him to a panorama of his past sexual encounters. At the bottom of the track, in hideous anticipation, wait the women of the convention. They hurl him into a cage and truck him off to his trial. Acquitted of an unknown crime. Snaporaz elects nevertheless to suffer the punishment: revelation of his Ideal Woman...