Word: sosa
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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...powerful. He's turning 28, and this week SEAN ("Puffy") COMBS, no fan of the small gesture, will throw himself a birthday bash of czarist proportions. To help produce a suitable invitation, he called upon such Puffy pals as Oprah Winfrey, CHRIS ROCK, Ben Stiller, ELLEN DEGENERES, SAMMY SOSA, Magic Johnson, Tommy Hilfiger, Will Smith, MARIAH CAREY and many others who no doubt saw the merit in assisting one of the decade's most successful music producers. The eclectic ensemble vamped for a videotape sent to Puffy's illustrious invites, revealing the party's date, time, suitable attire (fabulous, natch...
...their position in the American League. Tino Martinez wasn't even the best Martinez (Pedro, Boston). Or the second best (that would be Edgar, Seattle). No, Timmy, that wasn't the year Reggie Jackson was on the team. And Mark McGwire played for somebody else. As did Sammy Sosa, Ken Griffey, Barry Bonds, Greg Maddux and Roger Clemens. Your best bet is to try to distract Timmy with candy. In the future, candy will be even better...
...time. While most good teams have three solid starting pitchers and a rotating journeyman, the Yankees had six great starters: David Wells, David Cone, Andy Pettitte, Orlando Hernandez, Hideki Irabu and Ramiro Mendoza. Their bench could have beaten other teams. The Yankees, in contrast to the attention-grabbing McGwire-Sosa home run race, got wins and bad Nielsen ratings by playing "small ball": by massaging the first run over the plate, and then another and another. Batters patiently waited for hittable balls and forced pitchers deep into the count. Coaches stressed on-base percentage over home runs. Everyone played crisp...
...just tell Timmy that baseball, for once, showed people how to live. While America's leaders disgusted them and the economy frightened them, they got a wholesome epic. McGwire and Sosa congenially ribbed each other into amassing 136 home runs while Cal Ripken ended his fantastically mundane consecutive game streak by silently slipping away because it was time to let someone new have a turn. And the Yankees played hard, worked together and won a lot of ball games. We got everything we wished We hope, when you tell this story, America won't need baseball as badly...
...final four games of the Yanks' 125-win march into history got, according to early estimates, the worst Nielsens of any Series, breaking last year's nadir. And that Series was exciting (or so I hear). All the shiny new ballparks are full -- at least when McGwire or Sosa is playing. But these days, it's the ratings that matter, and baseball is getting dangerously near (gasp!) hockey territory. Maybe if Fox could put a camera in Don Zimmer's belly button...